Team shortlist30 Mar 2017 AT 03:03 PM

21 emotional stages of moving to a new apartment in Dubai

Panic: what on Earth are “white goods”?
Team shortlist30 Mar 2017 AT 03:03 PM
21 emotional stages of moving to a new apartment in Dubai
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1. Denial
You know it’s time to move but you keep kidding yourself. You’ve been in a temporary apartment/flat share/studio in the middle of nowhere for too long and you’re tired of saying it’s “not that bad.”

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2. Acceptance
Ok, ok. While the ridiculous commute may be a great opportunity to catch up on a new podcast, it’s making you late every day. And it is that bad.

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3. Excitement
You tell your friends and colleagues that you’re moving. They all start sharing Facebook statuses about the fact you’re looking for a new apartment, or sending you links to “great new buildings”.

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4. Disappointment
It quickly dawns on you that although you’d love to live on The Palm, or have the slick pad on City Walk, you can’t afford any of these “great new buildings”.

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5. More disappointment
Someone has commented on your friend’s Facebook status to say that their friend’s colleague’s brother is looking for a flatmate. He has a room in the Marina that’s within your budget! …Oh wait, it’s actually a maid’s room with no windows.

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6. Fear
You’ve already told your landlord/agency/roommates that you’re moving out. Time is closing in on you. What if you end up having to pitch a tent in the desert? Is that even legal?

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7. Exhaustion
You have a list of buildings that are within budget and in the right location, so you start calling around estate agents to set up viewings. Half of them have gone by the time you manage to dial the number.

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8. Exasperation
You can only view apartments after work so you set up two appointments for 7pm and 7.30pm. The DEWA is off in both properties, so you have to use the torch on your phone in order to see anything. 

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9. Hope
You get a tip off about a place that’s just become available. A friend of a friend is leaving Dubai and going back home. It’s within budget…

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10. Joy
It’s not horrible! You can actually imagine yourself cooking in the kitchen and admiring that lovely view.

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11. Panic… again
The lease is signed! But you suddenly realise that this means you are tied into staying in Dubai for 12 months. Even though you had no intention of leaving before this moment, it now seems like a huge commitment.

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12. Anxiety
You’re trying to pack. When did you buy all this junk? How can it be possible for one person to have so much stuff. HELP!

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13. Relief
Your friend gives you the phone number for some removal guys who will basically pack for you too.

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14. Panic… yet again
What on Earth are “white goods” and why does the new apartment not have them? “Sorry, I’ll have to skip the next 6 brunches to pay for my new washing machine.”

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15. Pure blind panic
The place doesn’t even have CURTAINS?!

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16. Enthusiasm
You love furniture shops anyway so it’s time to go and get everything you need. You spend 20.02 seconds in Marina Home before looking at some prices and deciding that you’re more of an IKEA kind of guy/girl anyway.

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17. Delight
It’s moving day, all your stuff is in your apartment as scheduled and you feel overcome with delight.

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18. Shock
You don’t have the internet. What are you supposed to do tonight? Wait… does this mean that you need to go and queue in the Du shop tomorrow? The horror.

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19. Hilarity
You’ve invited people over for dinner to celebrate your move and you realised too late that you don’t have the correct cooking utensils. *Dials Zataar W Zeit*

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20. Frustration
It’s 2am and you’ve just discovered that your next door neighbour is an up-and-coming DJ.

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21. Bliss
It’s been a long journey to get here, but you have curtains, “white goods”, furniture, INTERNET and apartment that feels like home.

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