17 solid pieces of advice for anyone celebrating New Year's Eve in Dubai
The best thing and perhaps the worst thing about New Year’s Eve is that everyone is trying to have the best time at the same time. That means crowds, traffic jams, crazy prices, no transport and too many who have taken the celebrating just a little too far. You know who we mean. So, before you plan your night of fun, here’s a useful checklist to keep everything on track.
1. DON’T bother turning up to Downtown after 6pm unless you want to spend New Year’s Eve sat in a car. And, don’t expect fireworks – this year it’s all about the light show.
2. DO charge your phone. You’ll probably take a lot of photos, thus using up the battery, and you won’t want a dead phone (and therefore no Uber) when 3am comes around.
3. DON’T bore people with your New Year’s resolutions. That’s what solitude and head-holding at 4pm on New Year’s Day is for.
4. DO keep your pets indoors. Dogs get really spooked by fireworks, while cats assume it’s all in their honour – and the last thing we need are cats with an even greater sense of entitlement in 2018.
5. DON’T forget that the better those big heels look when you’re getting ready, the more painful they’ll be at 4am walking about looking for a taxi.
6. DO actually watch the fireworks rather than filming them on your phone. When was the last time you thought, “I know, I’ll watch that film I made of some fireworks last New Year’s Eve”? Never, we suspect.
7. DON’T feel pressured into going out if you don’t want to. It’s fine to stay at home with a big wheel of cheese, a bottle of something French and The Crown Season 2 on Netflix. After all, Hugh Hefner didn’t call it amateur night for nothing.
8. DO keep a positive attitude all night. New Year’s Eve is as much a state of mind as an event and you get out of it what you put in. This is not the time to complain about rip-off prices and queues.
9. DON’T worry about keeping your New Year’s resolutions – everyone will have forgotten about your vague promises of daily yoga sessions, stab at veganism and weight loss goals before the month is out.
10. DO go somewhere with your full crowd. It’s always better to be at a less-good event with all your friends then a better one with just a few of you.
11. DON’T forget to head out extra early. Last New Year’s Eve, according to the RTA, there were a total of 1,793,691 journeys made in taxis and on the Metro. Getting a cab will be “6pm Thursday” levels of hard for most of the night.
12. DO consider going to a restaurant, instead of a club. Hunkering down with friends and good food is a great way to see in the New Year, especially if you like being able to hear what your friends are actually saying. Plus, you don’t have to queue for the bar.
13. DON’T expect to hear “Auld Lang Syne” at midnight in a nightclub. And pestering the Dutch techno DJ to play it is only funny once.
14. DO learn at least the first part of “Auld Lang Syne”. VERSE: “Should old acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should old acquaintance be forgot, and old lang syne?” CHORUS: “For auld lang syne, my dear, for auld lang syne, we’ll take a cup of kindness yet, for auld lang syne.” But you really don’t need to know any more than that. Nobody likes a show off.
15. DON’T raise expectations too high. It’s rarely the best night of the year as anyone who lived through the hype of Millennium Eve will tell you. Treat it like a bonus Friday night and you’ll have fun.
16. DO enjoy your last night of 2017 prices before VAT come into force the following day and we all look back on AED45 for a glass of something cold as a halcyon time.
17. DON’T forget to pace yourself – midnight is usually just after the midpoint of revelries rather than the firework-filled final bell of the night.